Reading some more #eJabberd docs...

https://docs.ejabberd.im/admin/configuration/listen/#ejabberd_stun

So far calling clients that are not on the same LAN is not working. You can call, but the call can not be connected.

Made some more changes just now (port forwards, docker ports), have to wait for fam to get back before I can try again (need more devices!)

BUT.
From the docs:

"The IPv4 address advertised by your TURN server. The address should not be NAT’ed or firewalled."

So. Ok. MAYBE I can get away with only STUN active. Maybe.
But afaik TURN is needed if STUN fails. Which sounds like a real possibility.

Context: I'm trying to run this all behind my NATed home connection.

Cause I'm a #Selfhosting punk. Rules are for chumps! (and people who want things to WORK, but screw those guys!).

Better get back to the day job first. Probably.